b'And about the time outs, Sue adds, a minute is long over her for a bit, so do I.enough. When theyre separated from you, they know some- Ellen 7, Rival(s) 6 (We both win a point).thing is wrong and they only want to be with you. They get I cannot end this confession without addressing the issuethe message quickly. of greatest interest: wiping Ravens bottom. I man-Sue, I ask, is it possible to undo their aged fine. After doing her business, Raven duti-training in three weeks? Maybe I should fullypresentedherselfatmyfeet.Sheleave each parent a bottle of wine with knowstheroutine.Iwipedherandanapology.AndthenIadd, watched her nub of a tail wag enthusi-Kidding!Iddrinkitall!Coping astically. She turned her face up tostrategy! me and I was smitten. No. Theyll quickly get back Ellen 7, Rival(s) 7.intotheirroutinewhentheir Andyoureprobablyparentsreturn.Keepinmind, wonderingwhopickedupthethis is all new to the dogs too. poop. Michael, of course.Yourebothcopingextremely Ellen 8, Rival(s) 7.well. Game, set, match toIcaressDarwinsbeautiful Aunt Mom. face and whisper, Oh, Darwin, Ourresponsibilitiescon-mylove,Ivegotyournumber clude and we return home. For a now. Ive called in the big gun and fewweeks,wemissbothdogs.now, my fine, fluffy friend, were on a Instinctively sensing this, their parentslevel playing field.sendpictureswithheart-warmingandMichael laughs. funnymessages. Theyunderstand.IevenGame changer: Ellen 6, Rival(s) 5. kissmyphonescreenonacoupleofthem.Prior to leaving, Nicole shared, Im not worried You two are dog parents for sure, Nicole writes. about the dogs. Im worried about the two of you! So, we reg- Onequietmorning,asourdog-lesslifecontinues,ularlysendpicturestotheirparents.Ifigurethisisboth Michael says, If you still want a dog, we should get one.thoughtful while also offering proof of life. Of the dogs and of Really? I whisper in disbelief.us. In that order.Yes. Now would be the time and I agree with what youveAt the end of the first week, I summon my courage. always said.Michael, we need to tell them that both dogs took off Whats that?and about the neighbour who may never speak to them again. That only good comes from having a dog and we should \x03 \x03 \x03 \x03 \x03Yeah, I know.have that in our lives. Then he adds, I would like to haveWhen are you going to do it? I ask. This is my courage. that in our lives. UWhy do I have to do it?Sheldon is your nephew. It should come from you. Hes also your nephew and you got us into this.But youre loving this!True, but thats not the point.He does contact them and with his disarming charm, con-fesses all. Im happy about that. He also reveals the dogs nick-names:LittleF***er1andLittleF***er2.Imnothappyabout that, but they laugh. They know.When we prepare to leave the house, Darwin expresses hisdispleasure by sitting on our feet. When we return, we experi-ence the unbridled joy of dogs welcoming their humans home.Raven spins around in circles and Darwin, using only his hind \x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03\x03 \x03legs, jumps high in the air like a cartoon character. This iswhat I signed up for.One night, at the end of our stay, Raven is unsettled. I tryto soothe her by caressing her head and whispering about the promise of tomorrow. She settles, but I realize that Im pre-pared to do this all night. Her small head sinks heavy in myhand. She trusts me and then falls asleep. And after watching42 THE NEW BARKER www.TheNewBarker.com'